How much does a polar bear weigh? Less than you cuz your fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the Mexican choose the blue marker over the green one? Because he his favorite color was green, and it was Opposite Day.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock, Knock! Cum inside ;;)

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why do guys love to wrestle? They like to have physical contact with other men.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

lol

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Did you hear about the plane that crashed and killed 1000 people? My sister has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

how do you kill a blonde? shoot her in the face with a pistol

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H20" and the second one says, "I'll have some H20 too." The second scientist dies after drinking hydrogen peroxide.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

who is mark

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the Jew wear a beanie while playing soccer? Because he shaved his head

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's better than eating baby? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

pinky ponky went a bit wonky oh no plz dont go or i will rape you untill you know

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A blonde walks into a bar. She is rushed to the hospital and treated for a broken nose and a busted lip. She now has a deformed nose.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red, But ravens are black, please go to China, and never come back!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Hey, why are asians yellow and africans brown? I'm colorblind.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why do we need to keep answering encryption codes? Because you can't keep a good Jew down (Wyndellberg)

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the chicken cross the road? It tried to to commit suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you make a ninja fly a plane? You put a gun to his head and say fly this plane.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

"I like my women like I like my spare tires, in the trunk of my car." -Paul Alangadan

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is black and white and red all over? Yemen's national flag.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the black guy do to the hooker, he took her dead body out of his trunk

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the young girl say to her step-dad? Nothing. She no longer talks to him after years and years of sexual abuse which left her emotionally scarred.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Land Rovers

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops