Two cougars are at a nightclub. Suddenly, they attack and 8 patrons are mauled to death.

How do you find the population of Mexico? You take a census count by mail and/or a door to door questionnaire.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? The Mexican is alive and the park bench isn't.

What do you call a bird on the beach? A seagull.

2 blonds are driving on the road on their way to Disney Land. They come to the sign that says Disney Land left so they started crying, turned around and went home.

How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? 1

roses are red, violets are violet

You know what's annoying When you suddenly die of a heart attack

roses are red violets are blue i dont really care about you

How did the chicken cross the road? By foot.

who can jump higher than mount everest? anyone. mount everest cant jump

How are Steve Jobs and The iPhone the same? They got progressively thinner over time.

A man and woman are out to eat on their first date. When the woman goes to pay, the man explains that he will cover the cost of the meal. That's a good thing because the woman didn't actually have any money. This happens all the time.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

What's the difference between Mitt Romney and a cheese grader? How the hell should i know?

A woman gets in her car to drive.

how do you keep a blond in sespence you dont tell her

What's funnier than a bus full of burning babies? Nothing.

Congratulations you just won a greencard to the USA! YES YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT! WELCOME TO: UNCLEAN SOUTH ARABIA. Press green thumb below = greencard. no srslsy.

Why was the Black man Running? Because he was trying to get in shape for the Olympics.

So there's A blonde, a brunette and a redhead at a lake. they all swim across and have a picnic at the other end.

minced oaths

how do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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