Why do all black people have nightmares? Beacause we killed the only one with a dream..

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How do you know when Taylor Swift is dead? When you don't hear Boyfriend songs anymore

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Girl: Do you like me :D Boy: No Girl: =( Boy: You didn'y ask me if i loved you Girl: :D Do you love me Boy: Naw

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Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkled? Because if they were small, white, and round they'd be called aspirin.

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A man goes to lie down on a couch. His wife walks by and sees him, and asks, "what are you doing?" to which he replies, "lying down"

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How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

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what did the banana say to the apple i dont know because bananas dont talk

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Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

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You wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? I slipped in mud. Wanna hear an even dirtier joke? Bubbles is a guy..

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What did the Dog say to the Cat? Nothing, Cats and Dogs are of different species and can therefore not understand one another.

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Roses are red, violets are red, daffodils are yellow, and pansies are pink.

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3 men walked into a bar... They sat down and had a beer.

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Shit happens. Correction: feces happens.

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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How many Grand Jurists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Depends on if it was a cop that snuffed out the light bulb.

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Wikipedia has no entry on "gullibility."

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Yo mama so fat,we are all very concerned for her health.

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Guy 1: there is this really funny knock knock joke. Ok you start. Guy 2: knock knock Guy 1: who's there Guy 2: umm what? I don't know

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Adolf Hitler was a humanitarian.

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Whats green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree you'll die? A pool table.

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Two cougars are at a nightclub. Suddenly, they attack and 8 patrons are mauled to death.

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What was Jonas's big success? Being Steven Spielbergs lead actor in his famous 1982 film.

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how do you get a taco? Buy one!

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What's funny about being adopted? Your parents never loved you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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