While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

What smells, tastes, and looks like trash? Garbage.

Im getting sick of holocaust jokes cant you Nazi Annefrankly they are dumb

cot!

roses are red, violets are blue, fudge is sweet, heres some fudge.

Why do black people love watermelon? It's simply delicious.

Why couldn't the young boy go trick or treating? He was a diabetic.

Women's rights.

Why couldn't the boy ride his bike? He had no legs. Why didn't he have any legs? He was hit by a truck.

Who flexes triceps more than anyone? James

Rebecca Black was taking a leisurely stroll on a Friday afternoon. She was consumed by a lion.

What comes after "Q" R

how do you make coffee you put it in a mug

What do you call a pelican with no wings? A dead pelican

I like my women like I like my coffee... Without a penis.

Jewish People

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

Knock Knock Who's There? ... knock a door run

Q: what do polo bears have for lunch A: iceburger

Why can't Michael Jackson play Chess? Because he's dead.

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

Why did the bunny eat his food

person 1-As me if I'm purple... person 2- Are you purple? person 1- no

How do you beat someone in a video game? You win it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...