If Vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Probably both plant life, sea-based creatures, and land-based animals. However, depending on the personal preference of the person, they can also be a vegetarian or not. They could also be cannibals, but the literal definition of humanitarian would go against any cannibalistic traditions due to the fact that humanitarians help others for the benefit of humanity as a whole, eating people would go against such beliefs.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

How do you starve colored people? deny them food stamps

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Why didn't the Mammoth go to school? Because his species went extinct before the development of organized education. And he's also a Mammoth.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

A cat fell out of a really tall tree. It didn't land on its feet.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

My sister has to take a dump

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Dying of terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did the man go to the restaurant? Because he wanted to get some food.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why did the rooster go to kfc? To see a chicken strip

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What is the difference between a baby and a tampoline? You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A black policeman and a white policeman work different shifts, one is during the day and one is at night and the both get equal pay.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Do you know any good bird jokes? Well this is hawkward...

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did the man do at the "take a penny leave a penny holder" He took a penny, and left a penny.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

why does andy thomson speak that slow because he speaks that way

thumb_up thumb_down +37

what is a vampires favorite dessert? a used tampon

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night to see your TV floating in midair? "I should probably lay off the hallucinogens."

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you say to a black man who is in your house at night-time, carrying your television? Sir, may you please put down the television as it belongs to me and I worked hard to earn the money to buy it. If you do not I will have to contact the authorities to deal with you in a correct and fair manner.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

thumb_up thumb_down +35

-Knock Knock -Whos there? -The police -OH SHIT

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He let go of it.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

what do you call a dead baby in a blender? child abuse

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Three vampires were at a bar 1 & 2 were drinking and asked the 3rd why he wasn't. He replied, I'm full I found a used tampon on my way here.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Knock knock! Who's there? Your neighbor My neighbor who? I already told you, it's pronounced "Wu". I'm very sorry, Mr. Wu

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops