Why did the 40 year old man quickly close his web page when his wife called his name? Because he had to leave.

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Raped

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Why did the Octopus jump off the bridge? To breathe

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what is green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

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Why didnt the kid go in the pool? Because there was no pool!!

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I am just trying to grasp the terms you use Nero, you are a genius, I mean I always heard about it, but honestly, well, my first impression of you here was... Different.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it got hit by a bus.

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What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

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Obama.

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Wat do u call a 2 root tall scottidh man named max? Max

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What comes after 69? Mouthwash

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What do you call a file named pedo? A. Pedobear B. Toast C. Pedofile

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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What did the Scorpio say to the Aquarius? "How's Uranus? Ohhhhh!" The Aquarius replied: "I have maggots."

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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What's a mexican's favorite sport? It varies from person to person.

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Two guys walk into a bar, the third one is a duck.

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FIONN'S HAIR 1 LIKE = £1 FOR A HAIRCUT

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, and says nothing. Ducks are incapable of speech and therefore it would be physically impossible for a duck to say anything. Where the duck walks up to does not partake in the matter.

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Two black guys are in an elevator, one guy gets off at the sixth floor, and the other on the eighth. And thats it.

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How do you know when a Mexican has died? Well based on the large mass of people inside and outside the funeral home who mostly seem to be of a mexican background and cultue, it would be safe to say that those are his/her friends and family who care deeply about them and therefore you could conclude that a Mexican person probably passed away. It's actually quite sad and going to be a rough few days for those closely connected to the person who died.

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why do sausage rolls taste of sausage and not roll? Seriously -_- what?

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Osama Bin Laden dies.

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A white guy, a mexican, and a black guy are in a race. Who always wins? Whichever one crosses the finish line first

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops