Why didn't the boy eat his vegetables? he was dead

Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

So a blond, a brunette, a ninja, a pirate, a priest, a rabbi, a mathematician and an engineer all walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What, is this some kind of joke?"

What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

Three black men walk into a gas station and don't steal anything.

Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

Why didn't Johns book get published? He had dyslexia.

Faithful men.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

What did the man do when he got home from work? Hit his wife.

A bartender walks into a bar. I know what you're thinking. You think he works there but that is not correct. He works at a different bar. Anyways, he buys a few drinks and leaves. He was impressed with the service.

There are two jews in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here" and the other says "AHH A TALKING JEW"

Whats white and sticky? Glue.

Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

What did the indian boy say to his friend? He didn't he was too busy studying

What do you call a fridge painted red and brown? A fridge.

What do you get when you cross a baby and a chainsaw? Life imprisonment.

Why did the old man die? He was old.

How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

knock knock who's there? A worm, your dead in a coffin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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