Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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I walked into a Mcdonald's and ordered a Big Mac. I regretted it later.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? To visit the graves of his wife and only daughter who were killed in a car accident at the fault of a drunk driver many years prior.

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What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

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Why cant the asian find his family? His eyes were too squinty

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Q: How Do you make a baby be quiet? A: slowly chop it's head off with a blunted axe once it's head is off eat it

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why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

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What did the man say to the young, blond athletic girl walking by? "Hi."

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what has four legs but cant move? dead dog

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Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

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Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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What's Kanye West's goal in life? To dash the hopes and dreams of Taylor Swift on national television.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

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Q: What did the floor say to the Christmas tree? A: Your balls are hanging.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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The global news

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what did the maker of anti jokes website say while reading some of the jokes on here? these people r idiots. and he lived happily ever after. then died. Good one

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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rozes r read violots r bue i cannt soell causse ima bliend

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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guy walks into a bar.... Ouch.

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A white man, a black man, and a brown man are all in an elevator. The white man laughs "this is like the start to a racist joke or something." The other two men strangle him because he is white.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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