How do you fix America's national security issues? Nuke russia

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Two oranges walking down the street, one says to the other, "Where do you live?". The other replies "I'm not telling you, you'll steel my washing"

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The cookie monster walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why do you seem so blue?" Everyone laughed. Then the cookie monster replied "my wife died."

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Hi. Hello. I live in Iowa. Same. Im your neighbor. Same. I like corn. Same. Im gay. Same. HAHAHAHAHAHA gotcha! No i really am gay and the fact that you thought that was funny saddens me deeply.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I kinda have a bad memory What are we doing again?

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Women's Rights

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3 black guys are in the back of a car. Who is driving? A taxi driver

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A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. Why? A. To get to the other side. A. Knock, Knock. B. Who's there? A. The chicken.

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Why did the alien cross the road. To get to his ship.

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Two guys were Arguing. (A & B) A. You suck B. If i suck then you choke. A. The only way id choke is if i smelled your stank ass breathe. B. The only way id have stank ass breathe is if i was liking your moms vagina A. The only way my mom's pussy would stank is if you were liking it. B. The only way id be liking your moms pussy is if it were a dick.... Both stare at each other... and walk off awkwardly

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Why did the chicken cross the road Because the farmer is obviously to stupid to build a proper chicken coop, and thus his chicken is crossing the road and will most likely be hit by a car

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what do you call a dead arab? a suicide bomber

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Q: What is red and green and goes 100/mph? A: A frog in a blender

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What happened when the turkey jumped out of the airplane? It fell.

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How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb about 4

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Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says why the long face? The horse does not reply because it is a horse. He then is confused of where he is and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a couple stools.

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Why couldn't the little girl see in the dark? She had no eyes.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why doesn't Andy wanna bend over to puck something up? That's how he got assraped!

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25

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Why did Mary fall of the tire swing? Because she's a dumbass

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a person who will soon die of beeties

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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