Why was a black person on the run, being trailed by police officers? They were all late to work; their work places were coincidentally situated near each other.

Agent 47.

Why are there cookie's in the jar? 'Cause I put cookies in the jar

Axel? Its Eliza, is that you? You alive again? I don't want to be no successor of anything, but thanks I guess. Neo-Nero has not shown up since you returned, I think he isn't very proud of himself and wont be a problem here on forward. He did push me aside, but now that you are alive, I wont even consider the thought of you "dying again" and unless you are dying or seriously ill, I don't want to hear anything about it. Seriously, how bad are you doing? Physically I mean? I am relieved, I mean we all thought you where dead.

What is blue and smells like red paint, Blue Paint

Elephants can't jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

Hickory dickory dock, The mouse ran up the clock, Barbara called the exterminator, Who killed all 10 of them.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

What did the sting ray say to steve irwin? It doesn't matter , steve irwin is dead, dead as a doormat.

Q: How many light bulbs does it take to change a blonde? A: One, if she tries to swallow it.

What did the astronaut say when he stepped on the moon? Oops, sorry.

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

The WNBA.

Why did the man put his money in the freezer? Perhaps he didn't believe in banks.

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends what its name is.

what did the penis say to the vagina? SMACK SMACK SMACK

"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

whats worse than the holocaust ? ms.brinkmann? noo close....a black guy trying toget a job.

Why is the country in a national deficit? Because the Illuminati want to control all human beings in a socialist new world order.

knock knock father: who's there? young man: it's I, your son. father: ....... what? young man: dad let me in, I'm sorry! father: i don't have a son.... young man: but.... i love you... father: get off my porch, my son is dead to me. (whimper, fading footsteps)

what did one lady say to another lady we are both ladies

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

A drunk guy walks out of an AA meeting.

one time, there was this anti-joke.com joke set-up. It was just like a normal joke set-up. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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