Why'd the squrille fall out of the Tree? Cause it was dead

- Knock, knock. -- How many dead babies does it take to cross the street and walk into a bar? - That's an odd question to ask to a visitor. -- Your mom.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. "Knock, Knock" "Who's There?" "Not Sally."

What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a pair of shoes and gloves

Why did the chicken cross the road? The Holocaust.

What is brown and sticky? A stick.

A seal walks into a club. And proceeds to die. Why? The seal isn't able to walk so it was crawling and a man was swinging a club to it's head, so it perished and he could feed his family. The Statement was censored by the FCC

A boy walks into a baker, asks for a loaf of bread. The baker enquires "White or brown?" to which the boy replies "It doesn't matter, I've got my bike."

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Knock Knock Who's There? I am. I am who? I think someone has contracted amnesia.

What do you call a man with no heart? Dead.

A Man walks into a bar and asks for a shot. The Bartender proceeds to unload a 30 round banana clip into his head, neck, and midsection.

Charlie Sheen walks into a bar... Every morning, and stays until it closes... [credit gilbert gottfried]

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Your mom is so fat shes having trouble getting into her own pants.

-What's brown and rhymes with snoop? -Dr. Dre

What is chewy and tastes like gum? Chewing gum.

A duck walks into a restraunt and sit's down at it's table. The waiter asks what the duck would like to eat. The duck says "I'd like a tasty, healthy meal that will help me lose weight." The waiter says "How about the rocket salad?" So, the duck orders a rocket salad, eat's it, pays his bill, and leaves.

What do you call a Mexican mixed with a platypus? a pineapple

What's the worst part about eating a dead baby? It's a tie between the smell, the taste, and the depression associated with whatever decline in humanitsy that has brought you to this point in your life. Overall, it's an outright terrible situation.

A man once went duck pin bowling, 5 years later he died of leukemia.

a guy walks into another tall man knowing that he has something weird in his mouth. he pulls out a fly, apologizes for running into him and promptly walks to his small appartment to brush his teeth. the next day a fridge hits him in the face and he spontaneously combusts. he was never seen again.

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, a dead baby is a horrible sight and shouldn't be laughed at.

what did the black kid get for Christmas? your bike

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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