Q: Why was the little girl cowering in a closet in a corner. A: Because there was a murderer/rapist in her house with her oarents gone.

Men, get on the boat.

What's green and has wheels? A frog in a wheelchair

Why didnt Santa give the little Girl her Pony? Santas not real.

Why did the plane crash? Because a loaf of bread was the pilot.

Why was Michael Jackson seen shopping at Kmart? Because he heard little boys pants were 50% off the original price.

There is this dylectic who can't spell.

What's black, white, and red all over? An interracial man with multiple stab wounds.

What is worse than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Obama

Why can't Micheal J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because there is no such person as Micheal J. Fox. Michael J. Fox, on the other hand, cannot draw a perfect circle because he has Parkinson's disease.

Why couldn't the Mexican man get a job? Because he was dead.

Whats 9+10? Well it's certainly not 21

What do You call a black porn star from alaska? By their first or full name depending on your relationship with them and the situation.

Why was the boy mentally retarded? Because his mother was a tree

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

Where's my tractor?

Women's rights

An irish man walks out of a bar

How do you take a picture of a man with a wooden leg? You can't take pictures with wooden legs.

What did the chicken do? He crossed the road.

Son : daddy ,I got punished in school today. Dad :why? Son: My teacher pointed the scale towards me saying -"At the end of this scale there is an idiot"..... I just asked "WHICH END ?.

knock knock who's there? bell bell who? bellend

It was a stormy night and a stinking boy was running away from the co-op, he was clutching onto his pocket and constantly looked over his shoulder.... panting the boy reaches for a rusty door handle he opens the door quickly and shuts it behind him. "mam i got tea" said the boy "thanks david we will eat tonight for once" said a big chinned pharaoh.

why did the chicken cross the road ...WHO FREAKING CARES!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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