Why was the math text book so worried....… Because he had to many problems

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Q: What's worse than seeing a scorpion A: being stung by that scorpion

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What did the kind hearted wolf do when he saw the small, helpless, fluffy bunny? He ate it.

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A girl and a boy where sitting on a couch together. The boy told the girl politly that she hass gained a significant amount of weight and should lose it. She then pulled out a candy bar in her back pocket and shoved it down his throat, to which he suffocated, because she was on her period when to comment was made.

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racism...deal with it!

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A man walks into a bar, looks to the right and sees a man one foot tall playing the piano, he sits at the bar and says to the bar tender,"I'm feeling kind of down" the bar tender gives him a bottle of very strong alcohol and later that night he goes home and hangs himself.

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A lonely man walks into a Self-Esteem class. He sits alone in the back because of his low self-esteem. Forever alone.

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How do you get Jake snow to shut up? Say shut up

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A man said to another man," you are so stupid you climbed a glass wall to see what was on the other side." The second man said," well you were on this side of the wall and I'm going to kick your ass." The second man had been drinking that night.

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there once was a man from Nantucket. He was a fisherman.

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What did the penguin say to the tiger? I'm in the wrong country.

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DON'T OPEN IT IT'S PANDORA'S BOX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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I look back at all those hours I wasted playing those stupid video games, but then I'm reminded of all those people I brutally killed.

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What do an Eagle and a sugar cube have in common? The fact that if let to disintegrate they both turn slowly to hydrogen after a period of time.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock "Who's there?" Not Sally!

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Why did the boy fail his math test? Because his Mother threw a refrigerator at him.

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what is red white and blue? the french flag

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A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothin. You already told her twice.

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Gladly, you sound very confident, makes me happy. Well, doctors thought I had ADHD (go figure) but I am pretty calm outside the internet, then they went with ADD, but since my attention is twofold, this meaning that I can get a lecture, while noticing a toothpick falling on the other side of the room (noticing as in perceiving with focus not necessarily listening but you know, seeing from the corner of ones eye) Yet still focus well enough to get the lecture in details. So its not split focus such as in ADD, but dual, as in me being able to think about two things at once, but also burning out extremely fast, which again, is far from ADD.

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What do you call a person with no arms or legs rolling around in leaves? I don't know that seems like a highly improbable situation

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Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

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A black man is playing guitar for a white man and a chinese man. After he is finished playing the white man and chinese man compliment him on his nice playing.

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How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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