knock knock , who there ray, ray who , ray winstone , I am your daddy you'll get your perks.

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knock knock? Whos there? a questionable person. What? exactly.

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What did the joke say to the antijoke? Nothing.

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boys go to college to get more knowledge. Girls go to Jupiter to work in the kitchen.

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what is long on joe? Not his dick thats for sure.

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In 1284, while the town of Hamelin was suffering from a rat infestation, a man dressed in pied clothing appeared, claiming to be a rat-catcher. He loyally promised the townsmen a solution for their problem with the rats. The townsmen in appreciation and glad to get rid of the infestation promised to pay him for the removal of the rats, they were looking forward to being left in peace. The man pleased with their decision accepted, and played a mystical musical pipe to lure the rats with a joyous song into the Weser River, where all but one drowned. Despite his renowned success, the people reneged on their promise and refused to pay the rat-catcher the full amount of money. The man left the town angry and upset the people had betrayed his kindness, he did however vow to return some time later, seeking revenge. On Saint John and Paul's day while the inhabitants were happily sat in church, he played his pipe yet again, dressed in green, like a hunter, this time attracting the young and joyful children of Hamelin. One hundred and thirty boys and girls followed him out of the town, skipping in song as they went, where they were lured into a cave. The events that followed are now known as the 1284 mass child massacrer, in which all 130 children were raped and savagely tortured and killed one by one, each viscously taped and recorded for the pipe pipers satisfaction, where a copy of each tape was sent to their corresponding parents, this was before their bodies turned up dangling from a tree and the bottom of the village, all 130 of them unrecognisable from decomposition and mutilation the pipe piper had inflicted.

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what is hollow and bloody? Vagina when it gets genital herpes

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What is the difference between a white mans penis and a black mans penis? It doesn't matter, phallic size isn't everything its what you do that defies you.

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What do you call it when a cave man pisses himself running from a t-rex? Historically incorrect.

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Bob: Say this word that I spell out. Jane: Ok Bob: N.I.N.A. Jane: Um...Nina? Bob: Correct. Now try N.I.N.O. Jane: Nino like el nino Bob: Good. How about N.I.N.E. Jane: Ninny? Bob: Hahaha wrong

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Knock Knock Who's there I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock

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A black man wearing a belt. Oh, he has a shoelace!

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Why was the Jamaican man smoking pot? His doctor prescribed it. The man has a serious case of glaucoma.

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why was the pen lonely? because it didn't have a pen pall

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I'm not here.

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There once was a man from Peru Who fell asleep in a canoe He got a slight case of sunburn which improved later after applying some ointment.

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What is the difference between a cow and a pig? To get to the other side.

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69

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who's sexually attracted to bones? James Cornish

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would you rather harry styles my dick have harry styles suck my dick or both of you style on my harry dick?

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple whilst you're in a bar after finding out you have cancer when you visited your families grave? Having a refrigerator thrown at you by an aids infected monkey with no arms or legs.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? A robber who will most likely kill you along with anyone else who will ruin their chances of becoming more wealthy off your most prized possessions.

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What do you call a Mexican flying a plane? A pilot

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican; the black man had too much alcohol and the Mexican was the designated driver.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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