A pirate walks into a bar, and the bartender asks, "why do you have a wheel in your pants?"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its not for us to determine its motive, i'm sure it has its reasons

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the black kid get for christmas? Nothing, he doesn't celebrate christmas

thumb_up thumb_down +7

The blonde is in the park withb a rope a man passes and says what are u doing, she says im goin o hang and kill myself. the next day the man comes back and sees the blonde there alive he says i thought u were goin hang yourself she says i tried but i couldnt breathe.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Two cows were on a field, one cow say "moo", the other... didn't say anything because it wasn't a cow

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Remember that comic blooper? Captain America fighting some dude: Okay buster only one of us is getting out of here alive! Next panel: Captain is kicking his foe and yelling AND IT WONT BE MEEEEEEEE! ...

thumb_up thumb_down +12

roses are red violets are too im bleeding

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

thumb_up thumb_down +94

Kameron Brown is gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man goes into a butcher shop and says, "I bet you 350 euro that you can't reach that bit of meat," indicating a cut of beef hanging above him. The butcher looks up and says, "No way." The man says, "Why not?" And the butcher answers, "I have a huge gambling addiction, after losing my family to it, this job is all I have left" The man leaves, ruing the silly bet he had placed.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did the black man say to the other black man. We're both niggas.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Andrew: who's better at football, Peyton Manning or Tom Brady? Thomas: ur mom

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Roses are red Violets are blue My body is ready I want you

thumb_up thumb_down -9

i woke up in the middle of the night and my entire bed was wet... know what i did? i layed a towel down and went back to sleep

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

thumb_up thumb_down +3

you ever hear the joke about the rabbi, the pope and an elephant? No? well its a good one...

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q : What did Piers tell his friend before leaving ? A : Bye.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, it seem's that someone has been bathroom on my lawn. "Martha, I'm not cleaning this up"

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A baby gets hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a Nazi in an airplane? Above sea level

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Sticks and stones may break my bones.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I called your friend gay and he hit me with his fist because he was angry at me for using gay in a derogatory way.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops