Oliver O'Farkle walks into a blue room carrying a bag of oranges and Swanson J. Doople walks into the same room in a parallel universe carrying a ballpeen hammer. How much collective space do the two women occupy and will they be able to make the 4pm train to Terre Haute? No, because the train is running late so transportation efficiency on the day in question proves impossible.

A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

Are you from Tennessee? Cause Jamaican me crazy.

That awkward momment when there is no Candy in the Van... <3

When is a door not a door? When your burns down.

Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

Why is Ray Charles always smiling? He's not, corpses rarely smile

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE HERE'S A KNIFE KILL YOURSELF KANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How do you confuse a blond? Dress up as Lady Gaga and yell "Ni!" in her face.

roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

What do you get when you eat all potatoes Their all gone

Will I be watching The Voice tonight? no.

After thinking hard for a very long time, the pig realized he was a fat, worthless piece of shit.

Why did Hitler shoot himself He saw his his gas bill

What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

What did the tree say to the plant. Nothing tree's cant talk.

Your so ugly that your birth certeficate is a apology letter from the condum factory

What do you call it when you eat cheese that's not yours? Stealing.

Why couldn't the black man sleep at night? His eye lids were cut off

What's worse than walking into a lampost? Your seven year old child accidentally finding and watching a sex tape that you made years ago.

Three males walked into a bar. one of them was a kangaroo.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...