How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

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Two guys were Arguing. (A & B) A. You suck B. If i suck then you choke. A. The only way id choke is if i smelled your stank ass breathe. B. The only way id have stank ass breathe is if i was liking your moms vagina A. The only way my mom's pussy would stank is if you were liking it. B. The only way id be liking your moms pussy is if it were a dick.... Both stare at each other... and walk off awkwardly

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Whats a hobbo's favorite food? Trash

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The asian parent's look at their child and say in an angry voice. "Y U NO DOCTOR." The kid was amazed how uneducated they were in english after living in america for 10 years.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? no... Well, It's really nice. :)

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A: thats what your mom said last night! B: my mom committed suicide when i was three because she could not handle the stress of being a teen mother with an abusive boyfriend. A: oh... B: yeah....

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HOLY COW!

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A baby walks into a bar, not long before it leaves out of the bar.

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knock knock who's there? john john who? john opens his mouth only to be gunned down by a terrorist attack

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Why does Hilter hate Jews? He's incapable of hating because he's dead.

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Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

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what happens when chuck norris does a push up. he pushes himself up

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Did you hear the one about the Gay Irish Politician who was running for President?! He withdrew his candidacy.

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Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

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An insane individual walks into a bank and asks for $500. The teller refuses since he doesn't have an account, so the individual pulls out a gun and asks the teller again. The teller presses the silent panic button, causing the cops to show up and arrest the gunman, but not before he manages to shoot the teller and the small child standing next two counters over.

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That awkward moment when a sentence doesn't end the way you think it octopus.

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Yo mamma is so pretty, she is frequently complimented on her good looks.

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas Nothing he didnt live that long

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What is black and white and red all over? A Zebra that has been fatally maimed by a hungry lion.

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What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

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What is the difference between an apple and an apple? One has a brown spot.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7 ? : Because 7 8 9

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wat do u call a person who is ugly ugly

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Enough.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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