the awkward moment when a sentence doesnt end the way you think it octopus

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungie cord? My ass.

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why did the pinapple walk the plank? to eat a cat because cheese say people!

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Your mama's so fat, she can't even find clothes that fit her well.

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Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance covered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be paid for." The man snaps his fingers and says "Damn! I should've voted Democrat!"

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What is 18 inches long and makes a woman scream all night? Crib death.

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that awkward moment when your teachers a duck

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Why did the bear eat the asian? It was hungry

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A man walks into a bar. Itwas an metal bar so the man was hurt.

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Do you know what does Wikipedia says about Elton John ? It says that Sir Elton Hercules John, CBE (born Reginald Kenneth Dwight; 25 March 1947) is an English singer-songwriter, composer and pianist. He has worked with his songwriting partner Bernie Taupin since 1967; they have collaborated on more than 30 albums to date.

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What did the man say before he killed himself? I am going to kill myself

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Latvia isn't a joke

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Whats worse then reading the same joke over and over again? Getting mutilated by a cupcake.

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A traveling salesman stops at a farmer's house. The farmer then offers the salesman a bed with his daughter. The salesman quickly replied, "I don't want to go to bed right now. I need to know the way to Pawtucket." The farmer then gave the salesman directions and the two parted ways.

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So a Jewish Family wakes into a German Pizzeria. They were very satisfied with the service and ended up tipping the waiter 20%

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Why did the dog's chin get all scraped up? He didn't have any front legs.

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Why can't the T-rex clap? Because it's extinct

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Will gropes Ebola victims

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Just found out that it doesn't work.

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Why did the Wife cheat on her Husband? Because she was a f***ing BITCH.

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Did you hear what happened when the President, the Pope and the Dalai Lama went golfing? Neither did I.

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One day I walked into my backyard I saw a squirrel Then I was like oh hey squirrel

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Yo mamma is so hairy that she had to shave

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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