rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Whats white, black, and red all over? A penguin on fire

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? - To rape you. Knock Knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what is long hard and full of seamen......... A sumbirine..........................(what were you thinking)

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Two people walk into Israel. The first is shot on the spot. The second screams "I only have two pennies in my pocket!" Immediately he is raped by five Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

who holds the world record for longest amount of time on fire? Jim Rome

thumb_up thumb_down +13

homosexuals are gay

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what do you call lots of jews on a train? Call them what you want they aren't coming back!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Yo mama so ugly... she has an extremely bad burn on her face.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Whats the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what does trondifly mean? trondify is not a real word.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had just escaped from the slaughterhouse and ran for its life.

thumb_up thumb_down +102

So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -10

My claustrophobia was cured by imagining that all small spaces were naked.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

whats worse than Brussels sprouts brussels sprouts that has petite vegetation, lack of sun causing mold and placed in a septic tank.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why couldn't the skeleton cross the road? Because it was dead, thus incapable of independent movement.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

2 polar bears are standing on a chunk of ice that is floating in the Arctic Sea. One turns to the other and says, 'Dyu know; I keep thinking it's Thursday...'

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? 124

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Roses are red, Violets are blue, get in my bed so i can fu** you!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops