why did the chicken cross the road cause he was suicidal but a car just didnt happen to hit him.

What's orange and rhymes with parrot? Carrot

Do you want to hear a joke? No. Women's- oh, okay.

How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

A mormon walks into a bar. The Bartender says "What can I get you" The Mormon says "Sparkling Water please. In my religion we don't drink alcohol."

dick dick dick... frogs

Why did the chicken cross the road? When he first entered the world, Chicken was a lonely bird. Nobody else liked him. Not even his mother. He was small and scrawny, and whenever the farmer came to feed the pigs or shear the sheep, he would get scared and hide in between two pieces of wood. One day Chicken woke up and his family was gone. Although they had never loved him, his heart was tender, and he was desperately concerned for him. After hours of searching for them, he overheard Cow speaking to Horse: "It's a tragedy, really. They were such a happy family. But now their off to the land of KFC, forever lost in the sea of chicken wings. But Chicken was determined to change his family's fate. He escaped the barn and ran into the woods. There he traveled day by day, and at night he hid from the hungry wolves. Life in the forest was tough, but no tougher than the loss of loved ones, so he kept going. On and on and on, until the forest ended and the city began. It was a new world to Chicken. He had never seen so many different buildings and contraptions. His eyes had never before held the wonder of the majesty of such a strange place. After traveling through the dangerous alleys of the city, he finally found it: the terrible land of KFC. The place where humans' dreams begin, but chickens' end. The place of horror and death and unfairness. The place that summarized Chicken's whole life. He was here now. The only thing separating him from his family was a road. A road that was so small compared to his previous trials, so incomprehensibly tiny when placed Nextel to the gaping hole in his broken heart. So the chicken crossed the road. Then he got hit by a bus.

A priest, a monk, and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order drinks and keep the conversation to non-controversial topics.

Q:What does a wheel a triangle and a circle all have in common A:There all round, I lied about the triangle.

An American, an Irish man, a Chinese man and a Black man walk in to a Bar, the Bartender takes their order

What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a pair of shoes and gloves

What's my favorite color?? I don't have one, i'm a joke you idiot.

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body in an accident? He bled to death.

How did Hellen Keller's parents torture her? They made her go to bed when she wasn't very sleepy

a carrot walks into a bar, carrots cant walk for they do not have legs.

A horse walks into a bar...n

What did the prisoner say to the man who posted his bail? Thank you.

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

Why did the homeless man get skin cancer Because he didn't have a home so the Suns rays had been directed towards him For 3 years and he was to poor to purchase Sun screen

Why did the girl commit suicide? She has been abused severely for seven years by her pet kangaroo.

Why did the man burn his face? He went into a fire. :D

knock knock. Who's there? Jehovah's witness. *Door Locks*

A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch!" Passersby notice the man is blind, which caused him not to notice the bar. He later died in the hospital from severe head trauma

Why did the boy go swimming in the ocean? He didn't. the current pulled him in and he drowned.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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