What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh

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Is it colder on a farm than in the winter?

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-Why did the man sue the train driver after he witnessed his friends death? -Because he was owed a duty of care.

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edmond alward. handyman services. call 0858430803.

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What did the black man get for Christmas? A felony conviction.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead black guy there were skid marks in front of the dead dog

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“Before I know it, he’s got both of my hands in his viselike grip above my head, and he’s pinning me to the wall using his lips … His other hand grabs my hair and yanks down, bringing my face up, and his lips are on mine … My tongue tentatively strokes his and joins his in a slow, erotic dance … His erection is against my belly.”

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is Patrick

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What do you call a dude dinosaur that's into other dude dinosaurs? A Bi-ceritops

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? 3.

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What's white and sticky? Snow. What were you thinking of?

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Whats funny about a guy with no legs? I bought him a wheelchair.

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More mindfuck "government hypnosis edition": What can doctors possibly do in order for you to wait enough for them to come to help you? They call you "their PATIENT!" Moral: So be patient and wait, oh thee brainwashed.

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What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

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Why can't Hellen Kelller drive? Because she's a woman.

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What did the fat man do? He fell over...

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Roses are red, violets are red, tulips are red, oh shit my gardens on fire!!!

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What did the elephant say to the zebra? Nothing, elephants can't talk.

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when you smile the whole world stops and stares for a while because you have one tooth and its half chipped.. and your a black mexican red head.

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Why did the car's airbag go off? He hit a boy eating his ice cream

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What did the unappreciated YTPer say in the comment section of Nyan Cat? "PLEASE CHECK OUT MY YTP'S! I'M BEGGING YOU! YOU DON'T LOVE ME!!! WHY?!!! Q_Q"

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Why was Katy Perry naked with your mom? Because they were having sex

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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