What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer..... I'm going to rip the scalp off of your son and where it on my face to a Cherokee Sacrificial Ceremony The other lawyer was actually a lightbulb

A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop? zero if you bite it

What did the blind boy get for one of his Christmas present? A cinema ticket.

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

What did the Black man say to the prostitute? Your job makes the risks of getting AIDs and other STDs much higher than the average person's.

Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and determination.

Three black men get out of a taxy. They split the bill evenly and get on with their day... By Wade

Child birth. So easy women can do it.

A horse walked into a bar and the bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse then replied, "Well my wife is dying of cancer, my mother is a drug addict, and my two kids are in the hospital for 3rd degree burns."

Sometimes Jamie wishes he could be a different person. He wishes he didnt have to eat dick everynight but it was all to late. He had to take it down the throat but he enjoyed the tickle it gave him

Whats smarter you or the person writing this? -The answer is that i said whats smarter not whose smarter so I am smarter because you had no clue this was point less pie

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: I didn't get to ask. He got hit by a car.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

What is a jew in space? Dead

Why couldn't Tommy pick up the bunny? Because the bunny was schizophrenic and Tommy wasn't real.

What did the giraffe say to the monkey? Nothing

Do you know what Stevie Wonder's house looks like? No. Well, neither does he.

whats the difference between 100 dead babies and a ferrari? the ferrari is not in my garage.

Knock Knock Who's There? Hi, I'm just going through the neighborhood to let everyone know that women secretly enjoy being raped.

What do you call a not as grumpy Jewish man in his mid 30s? Danny. What do you call 5 of his best friends? Arin, Suzy, Barry, Ninja Brian, And Ross. Another possible answer to the 1st question is currently not married.

What do you say to the woman who just got raped? Nothing you just raped her

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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