How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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-Children! Come inside! -Why? -We are going out...

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Why did the middle-aged black man lose his job? Because in this day in age, many businesses are being forced to lower their pay-roll, and he could no longer be afforded.

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What do you call a guy with no legs and no arms? Mat.

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Friend: Do you want to go to the bar or see a movie first? Me: Yes.

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What did the racist say to the other racist? Hey how was yesterday's clan meeting?

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Q:What the difference between a piano and a guitar A: Nothing, there both instruments and i lied about the difference

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Why was the man upset? His entire family was murdered, skinned, separated into assorted body parts, and stapled to trees.

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lipstick pig

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Who has big eyes, big ears, and a big mouth? The witness I'm about to murder so he cannot testify against me. Wish me luck.

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What's red and puts out fires? A fire truck? Oh, you've heard this joke before.

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Why are some people so awesome? Because their black.

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A large commercial airliner is piloted toward inner-city New York. The plane is driven into the World Trade Center by a terrorist. The United States will now issue a holiday to mourn all we have lost in this tragic event.

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What do you call a house big enough to fit all the poor people in America? A fairly large establishment without quality standards.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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A black man says "ask" correctly.

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what did the tree say to the person? nothing trees cant talk

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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If the best things in life are free, whats the hardest things in life? Death.

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What do you call a guy who has no experience flying a plane? Suicidal

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Three examples of how santa is gay 1) he says HO HO HO 2) he sneaks into your house at night from going down the chimney 3) he knows when u r sleeping and he knows when u r awake BONUS............. Better not pout, you better not cry, better watch out im telling u why.........SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO TOWN

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The doorbell repair man.

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How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? You shoot at the blonde. Causing her to fall, but I have a feeling she will be pretty mad!

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a jewish man walks into a wall with an erection. what hits first? his erection

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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