What do you call a person who drinks beer a lot? Alcohol abuser.

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Q:what has four legs, is green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A:a pool table

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What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? I don't eat hot dogs. Thank you though.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Joe Joe who? Your friend Joe OK come in

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1:Your reading my text. 2:Your wondering what the point is. 3:Your getting angry. 5:Your going to click thumbs down. 6:But wait! You didn't realize that there was no number 4. 7:Your checking it. 9:Your smiling. 10:Your smiling so much you forgot to check for number 8. 11:Your checking it. 12:Jokes on you.

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Whats funny about a guy with no legs? I bought him a wheelchair.

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What did the man screem before he crashed his car? i dont know, he died.

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This will be the least popular anti-joke. Dislike this joke.

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A child rides his bike down the sidewalk and stops at an intersection. He looks both ways, then crosses the road. What was he looking for? His family.

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Q: If your riding down the Nile on a boat and your boat springs a leak, how many boxes of pancake mix does it take to fix the hole? A: 58, because Koalas are marsupials

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your mama so old, shes dead.

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What's the same between a grape and an airplane? they both have wings but the grape doesn't

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U know whats worser than having a worm in your apple... Having 1352 dislikes on your anti-joke...

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A woman walks into a bar and orders a pint of ale. "Are you a Lesbian?", joked the barman. "Yes", replied the woman.

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A man walks into a bar and orders two shots the bartender then picks up his shotgun and gives it to him

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why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

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How do you get a single-armed monkey down from a tree? Wave.

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Why did the straight man turn gay? He didn't. He was always gay but had to hide this from his family and friends because of an overwhelming sense of homophobia in his community.

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Why did the little girl get a new tricycle? To cope with her father's death

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what did nena say in the library while her and her friends were on anti-jokes? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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A man walks into a bar. The other two ducked, and then immediately called an ambulance.

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what's gray, red, and goes over a 100 mph? a toad in a blender

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Birdie Birdie in the Sky, Left a message in my eye ... So I shot the little bitch

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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