What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A Pogo Stick

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How did the blonde girl fall down? She didnt see where she was goin

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What do you call a small chinese person? They prefer the term little person to the term midget.

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A woman walks into a bar.

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A Pool Table.

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what does a human and a bucket of red paint have in common? . . Both are not tigers

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What happens when you search andreas' mum in google? You are redirected to man porn

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Friends, they're like food. If you eat them, they die.

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In a galaxy far, far, away.... There were quasars, stars, and various sized meteors.

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Why was the number 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't.

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What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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One day, a guy wanted to know if all blondes really were dumb. He gathered a stadium full of blondes, picked one out of the blondes and said,"I will ask you a few questions. First, what is 23+12?" The blonde replied,"Uh, 30." The other blondes said,"Give her another chance!" "Alright. Next question. What is 30+30?" Said the inquirer. The blonde answered, "Oh! 300!" "Give her another chance!" The blonde crowd shouted. "Alright but this is the last question. What is 1+1?" The blonde answered, "2." The blonde crowd roared, "Give her another chance!"

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What has two arms and two legs? A human being.

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A man, a woman and their child wen to a restaurant. There was a horse in it and they left. The Holocaust begun

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Q: Why does a hamburger doesn't taste like an ice cream? A: Because.

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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Q: How many black people came KFC on June 31st? A: None because June 31st doesn't exist.

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Why wouldn't joey pay attention in class? Because he was being raped by a grizzly bear.

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Why was the man called Big Larry? His name was Larry and he was morbidly obese.

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue Oh, that's good to know.

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Oh please! Come on! Those that got to us where mostly Russians remember? And what where my parents? (if you do not know you might have guessed it by now) I found a guy that looked about the same as me, messed him up and put my jacket on him, I do not die that easily. Anyway, id explain more, but I have been without these fucking painkillers so long that I am talking trash on this stupid site again... Seriously the pain I am used to, but this addiction on painkillers is a bitch... (shedog if censor got a hold on it) But it turns out I cant sleep without them, sleep just does not come anymore, so Ill go get some now. Who are you by the way? I am Nero7, Aka Axel Knight.

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I walk into a bar...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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