what do u call 2 puerto rician men playing basketball? won on won

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, my chickens aren't allowed in rural areas...

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women sitting on a bench quietly. they have no ability to speak.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Wristwatch! Wristwatch who? Orange ya glad I didn't say banana

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What did the hammer say to the screwdriver? You're a tool

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? I raped your mom and she swallowed my load, k

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A man walks into a bar, he purchases a drink from the barman proceeds to finish the drink and then leaves.

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*Phone rings* Hello? Hi, is your refrigerator running? No, it actually broke down yesterday. Are you the repair man? Yes, the repairs will cost $400

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Tom: God! Matt:Where? Tom:Matt i was saying God ! Jesus! Matt: God and Jesus! wow! Tom: why am i talking to you? Matt: Wanna play a game? Tom:bye.

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What happenswhen a geman shepard jumps into a lake? it gets wet

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I have two hands. Some people dont.

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If two blondes had a kid it would probably be a blonde because two recessive chromosomes have a higher chance of showing than one dominant gene.

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cancer

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why did Suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms. knock knock? whos there not Suzie

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Why did Micheal fall off his bike? Someone threw a chainsaw at him.

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The global news

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What did the little boy get from his visit to Penn State? Raped.

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Contrary to popular statement, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade," you technically can't do this because of the need for water and sugar to make lemonade. Secondly, life can't technically hand you lemons because life isn't a physical thing that can hand you lemons. So really, you don't even have to worry about the second two ingredients.

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a man walks into a bar and buys a drink

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A dyslexic Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. He hits his head on it and is rushed to the hospital,only to discover the floor drenched in triceratops shit.

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A blind man walks into a bar. He cannot read the drink menu.

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Why did the house get trashed? Cause the babysitter was a rooster

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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how do you kill a zombie? Zombies arent real.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops