What's black, white, and red all over? Half of a dalmatian.

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I played the spoon game. In a white neighborhood.

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Why did Hitler kill himself? He realized what he'd gotten himself into and became severely depressed

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knock, knock who's their? police get down on the ground!

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A homeless man walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says it'll be $4.50. The homeless man doesn't have any money so he leaves.

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What happened to the little boy who threw a spitball at the teacher? He was killed the next day when the teacher, who had a history of mental instability and schizophrenia, decided to go on a shooting rampage in class.

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Knock Knock Who's there? I don't know Then why should I care I don't know

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whoever said we're all soft on the inside was probably not an experienced doctor.

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What did the Catholic priest say after he fell off a cliff? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What did the boy with cancer get for his birthday? Roses on his tombstone.

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what do you call a mothers mothers father's brother's son's uncle's sister's brother's aunt's father's stepbrother's granddaughter's mom? I dont know... im asking you, why are you reading the answers then?

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How many fingers am i holding up? 4

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what did the lesbian say to the man? I don't like penis

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What rhymes with Hitler? Walt Disney.

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so i was on anti joke and i read a joke, it made me laugh.

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Old, Asian, Woman who drive

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What do you call a Middle Eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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How was the copper wire invented? 2 Jews pulling on the same penny!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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What is black and white and sleeps a lot? A tired zebra.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What's black and white and red all over and can't go through a revolving door? A nun with a spear stuck in her head.

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How do you make an egg laugh? You can't. Eggs are inanimate objects which are incapable of emotion, thus laughter.

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whats worse than ten dead babies in one trashcan? one dead baby in ten trashcans

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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