A deer looks at the ground and sees something strange. He wonders what it could be. A rabbit comes along and thinks the same. A badger promptly arrives after the rabbit and thinks the exact same. 4 seconds later they all get hit by a train.

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Yo mama's so fat that she has a heart condition.

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Blarg

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if yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs?

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When life gives you lemons, squeeze them in someone's eyes.

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Your mom is so fat that when she went to the Doctors, He said she was slightly over weight

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i ate and i ate and i was sick on the floor 8x8=64

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Yo momma's so black, when yo poppa rides her, he says "Look! I'm Hiccup!"

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How do you do to stop a baby who is circling? You nail his other feet.

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In Soviet Russia it's pretty cold.

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Math Problem: John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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What does an Irishman say to you in the morning? Nothing because you only speak French.

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What rhymes with bigger and can jump really high? Tigger

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Knock knock Who's there The police "people began to jump out the back window"

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

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There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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What's a boulder's favorite type of music? Boulders don't have ears.

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http://anti-joke.com/

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What Did Gretel say to Hansel? Stop having sex with Ariana Grande!

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knock! knock! Who's there ...So y do you have a peep whole?

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Don't quote me on this Nero, but she kinda deserves it, she should know better, its not like you have gotten this far by not knowing your limits, even if you tend to break them way too often. Can you get rid of the hallucinations with your mind alone? If not get to sleep asap! And stay asleep for a month or so, and if they somehow cant feed your system intravenously, they can all get the fuck out of there.

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What did the coach do to the player Coached the player

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What would Michael Jackson do if he were in a room full of kids? Nothing, he's dead.

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how many black men did it take to steal from the whitehouse? Obama.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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