What did the dog say to the other dog? Were both dogs!

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. Why did the car crash? Because the driver was a loaf of bread. Why did the boat sink? Because the pirates attacked.

What is Abraham Lincoln's favorite website? Wikipedia. It's very informative. On second thought though, the Internet had not been invented yet back in his time.

Q. How do you kill 5000 flies? A. Slap a afraican in the face.

What do you get when you cross a stream with a prostitute? A wet hooker.

A black man walks into a bar. He paid his tab and couldn't have been more polite.

look this kid up on facebook and spam him!! its funny, Josh Noonan, also his cell number is 603 560 3399....

Helen Keller went to town riding on a pony she stuck a feather in her hat and called it uuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

What did the blonde say to the brunette? I just ate a chicken panini.

what's up? my penis.

Roses are red Violets are blue Your window is open I'm watching you

What do you get when you cross a parrot and a beach ball? A beach ball with a parrot design on it.

What do u do if a blonde throws a bomb at u Trigger the bomb and throw it back

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names

say this really fast dick chick, chick, dick, dick chick,chick dick, dick chick if you cant like it

My mates dad hasnt had a job in 20 years... its probably why there all homless outside my house.

Why did the man stop playing his computer game? The SWAT busted down his door and quickly pinned him down and arrested him for the murder of 7 families, he was charged for life in prison.

An owl and a squirrel were sitting on a tree branch. An acorn fell on the squirrel's head and surprised, the owl moved its head 3.276 degrees to the right. The squirrel apologized for the inconvenience, but the owl would not listen, so flew off to buy a ferry to help children with terminal illnesses get to school.

Why did Santa's little helper feel depressed? Neurotransmitters essential for happiness, such as serotonin and norepinephrine, were in rather low supply in the poor elf's brain.

What's better than winning the Silver Medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

What happened to the man who posted yet another repeated joke on anti joke? Nothing. He posted an old joke that everyone has seen a form of already.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a shiny new Cadillac? I don't have a shiny new Cadillac in my garage.

You Obviously Lack Originiality YOLO.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was deaf and blind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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