How do you call a dog with no legs? You can't call it, you have to go and pick it up.

How do you get a dead baby out of a blender? Doritos.

What did the girl say to the guy who poked her on Facebook? You poked me.

there are 2 muffins in an oven one says "man its hot in here" the other says "shut up i hate this joke"

Like to tell patrick porcupine to stop gaming

Dylan is gay

What's the difference between a duck?

Hi, how are you doing? Good how about yourself? Fine, thanks. Nice weather we're having Yeah, not too bad Have a nice day You too

A girl asks a guy "How come you don't take me dancing anymore?" The guy said "Because we were both killed in a car accident."

Guns don't kill people. Dangerous minorities do.

A raptor and a Tyrannosaurus Rex walk into a bar. Everyone runs for their lives as the dinosaurs ate everyone who was too slow.

Why did the woman fall off her bike? She got hit by a car door

Knock knock. Who's there? Hi. Hi Who? Hi who?! Hi Ho Hi HO. Its off to work we go!! umm.

What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

Justin Littleton's mom accidentally texting him about buying weed, and then offering to buy him ice cream to make up for it.

Q. How many babies does it take to paint a room? A. Depends on how hard you throw them.

Your mum's so fat that she's incredibly lucky she has a loving and supportive husband who values her personality over her appearance.

Why wasn't there a rainbow? It didn't rain.

Why is it interesting to watch your mum shower? It's Not, its sick you pervert

What do you expect from a perverted demon? -nothing less perverted!

Why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a woman

Roses are red, Viiolets are blue, Get in the gas chamber, You dirty Jew.

Actually, Red Bull helps temporarily restore wakefulness when experiencing fatique or drowsiness.

What do you do when life throws lemons at you? Take out your lemon shield and retreat deep into your lemon proof bunker.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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