There was a cat and a copy cat. the regular cat jumped off a cliff. How many cats are left? 2 Cats have 9 lives!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I think I may be colorblind.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a pig that just took a bath? Clean!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

The street outside of my house is covered in jelly. I have done this.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q; Why does paint dry? A; Because plankton are single cell organisms

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's purple, smells like an eggplant, and looks like an eggplant? An eggplant.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Yo mama so ugly, she has to work harder than most women to attract men.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What olympic event is Kosovo best known for getting gold? Kosovo is the world's newest country and therefore does not yet have complete international recognition.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a wanted serial killer on the run from the police

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I just witnessed a horrible accident today! It was like a silent movie, but with SOUND!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the white man say to the black man? Hello

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the TV fall of a cliff? Because a nice man was donating it to the homeless shelter which hangs over a cliff. The man placed the TV in the back room on the floor. There was a weak spot on the floor and when the fattest homeless person walked over the floor, the floor broke which was a HUGE inconvenience because he TV and the fat man fell through the floor and over the cliff, luckily the TV was plugged in so it was hanging by the cord but an old lady with Alzheimer's forgot that there was a hole in the floor and unplugged the TV so she could clean the switches. In the end the TV fell off the cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Knock knock. Who's there? AV. AV who? Asshole vison. Now that's Amusement Vision. (Remembering Amusement Vision...)

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Have you seen Hellen Kellers mon?... Neither has she

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what is the best thing to do if you are stuck in a cave with ten lions that haven't eaten in ten years? well the lions aren't the thing to worry about because if they have not eaten in ten years then they would have starved to death

thumb_up thumb_down +22

My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

do you know what's so funny? yup

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A man killed himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

2 girls talking to each other: brunette: Christmas is on Friday this year blonde: let's hope its not on Friday the 13th!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did the rock say to the other rock? Nothing they're rocks? What did the tree say to the other tree? Nothing they're both trees? What did the pillow say to the other pillow? Nothing they're both pillows? What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops