Do you know what african children do? They die of starvation.

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What's wrong with the axe murderer that lives down the street?? Nothing.

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Q: If a hen-and-a-half can lay an egg-and-a-half in a day-and-a-half, how long would it take a peg-legged grasshopper to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle? A: He'd give up.

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When does the ice cream get thrown at the yellow horse on thursday evening? Purple Monkey Rainbow

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I got a joke for ya. George W. Bush was our president. He is a joke, but no one is laughing.

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Q: What did Nala say to Simba during the stampede? A: Nothing. She was nowhere to be found during that scene.

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There are two muffins in an oven. One says nothing. Muffins can't talk.

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what do you get when you put a baby in a blender? salsa how to you get it out? tostitos

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Q: What's green and goes through walls? A: A pickle, you just have to throw it really hard.

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What do you call 10,000 lawers jumping out of a plane? A good start.

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How are a pizza and a jew similar? They both are people aside from the pizza.

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Stare at the person nearest to you and say "sprinkles" with the straightest face possible.

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A Polack walks into a bar. Which makes sense because the bar was in Warsaw.

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What's the mosy hardest game in the world? The Impossible Game.

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What did PSY say about his newest song? Probably something in Korean.

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what is a present you would give a werewolves? I said... OBAMA!!! tee hee

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Q: What would happen if you didn't sleep all night? A: You would probably be really tired and start seeing things and speaking strange sentences as a result.

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How do you knock a clown off a swing? Hit it with an axe multiple times.

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Your mom is so fat when she sat on wallmart she lowered the prices

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What did the plane say to the other plane? Boy, those towers fall!

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I am white, asian and black... What am I? A panda

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WOKE UP THIS MORNING AND SAW PROSTITUTE OUT THE WINDOW AND SAID GRANDMA GRANDMA CAN I GO PLAY WITH THAT PROSTITUTE SHE SAID NO YOU CAN PLAY WITH ME BECAUSE I'M A PROSTITUTE TOO

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Yo mama is so fat that her belly button reaches the door 15 minutes before she does- by Adam Chebali

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A little boy ran to the pool to see how long he could hold his breath. He slipped and fractured his skull.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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