so little jonny was doing bad in school like always so he decided to drop out and now he cant get a job and will have a terrible life and die alone

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One, two, three, four and five

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roses r nice violet are fine all be the 6 and you be 9

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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What do apples and bananas have in common? They're both red (except for bananas).

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You pour cold water on her head or make a loud noise nearby.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

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friend' Knock Knock! you; no one home go away

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually, 6's fear was totally irrational, and thus unexplainable. This sort of fear is generally referred to as a phobia.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? A n a l

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Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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Why did the polar bear cross the road? He didn't, there are no roads in Antarctica.

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What is black, white, and red all over? The Wall

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What is grosser than somebody eating their own booger? Someone else eating that persons booger

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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What did Helen Keller say after the Iron Maiden show? Nothing, she is a mute.

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haha. i got blocked too!!!!

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you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

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a boy walks over to the living room and shouts " happy birthday, daddy!!" the response is "i'm a cup, therefore i do not have a birthday because i am an inanimate object."

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There are two muffins in the oven. One says: "It's really getting hot in here!" The other one can't reply because it is already dead.

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how do you get a rat out the house you lift it up and put it outside

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What do you call a black man and an Asian working in a field? You politely ask their names and then use them; their colour is of no consequence.

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Why did Billy cross the road? Because Billy wasn't wearing his seatbelt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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