What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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What did Uncle Timmy give to Little John for his birthday? Sodomy.

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What do you call a black man that can steal, shoot, and jump? A basketball player.

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Knock knock Who's there? Timmy Timmy who? Timmy Smith

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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why did the farmer cry after a phone call? he just found out his wife just died of lung cancer

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What's the difference between a bomb and a muslim? Nothing. The difference is only apparent. At the fundamental basic building blocks of the universe, everything is made up of quarks.

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Why did the ckicken cross the road? to kiss my ass

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Q: What did the mentaly retarded kid get on his IQ test A: Drool

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Your family is dead. Your family is dead, who? Your family is dead.

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an emo kid walks into mcdonalds and orders a happy meal

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How I seem math word problems Scenario: 2 astronauts kayaking in the Sahara desert Question: How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse Answer: Purple, because ice cream has no bones

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Knock Knock! Who's There! That's right! And now for our next song: "Magic Bus!" One TwoThree Four.....

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call it, he isn't coming. Posted By: Lram

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Y

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A black guy and a white guy are in a car. What is going to happen? They will arrive at their destination.

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poop.........

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how long is a peice of string howeverlong you want to make it

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Why did the man go to space? He was a highly trained astronaut

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How do you drown a blonde? A: Drowing any person no matter the color of their hair is conpletely illegal and considered murder.

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How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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