a woman leaves the kitchen.......

How do you get a nun pregnant? You practice unprotected sex with her.

Yolo Pierre because of Etzio tickle shits faggatron and individual nut join forces to become the shit suckers

why didnt anyone like matt adams? cuz hes a stupid buttface

Q: What do you get when you throw a piece of bread in the oven? A: 6 million Jews

Burger King cashier: Are you on Team Jacob or Team Edward? Man: I'm on team I'm freaking hungry; now give me my food!

A baby seal walks into a club.

And Stephen Hawking said.

What is the most dangerous day of the week to leave the house? Garbage day. Moral: Or rather GAAAAAAAAAARBAAAAAGE DAAAAAAAAAAAAY! *BANG BANG BANG* >:D

Rose's Are Red Violet's are Blue You Should Be In A Zoo Dont Worry Ill Be There Too But I Wont Be In A Cage With You Ill Be Laughing At You.

A white man, hispanic man, and a black man walk into a bar together. They order cokes.

What did chad do when his friends came over? I'm not much of a fiction man personally.

Listen, I cannot as much as I would like, to take the full responsibility for every decision my former followers might decide to make of their own, we are no religion nor do we follow any kind of doctrines, we encourage freedom but also respect for our fellow human beings, all of them regardless of race or affiliation. But you let me know whoever has as much as looked at you the wrong way, and I will make sure they no longer find themselves welcome within my order, nor anywhere else if their actions merit the firm hands of justice.

why did the chicken cross the road? because he was stapled to the head of a penis that belonged to an asian man

What do you call a black man? A person

Three men walked into a bar. None were injured because they were all wearing hard hats as is the procedure for a construction site.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Heroshima

Why did the little girl have grass stains on her white dress? Because she was dragged into the forest and raped.

Why did the kid poo his pants? Because he was Matt Daly

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car because he was depressed and contemplating suicide.

Whats worst than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

A mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom says, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender replies, "Exactly. That's a health hazard. The health department already gave two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

What did the man do when he crossed the road? Nothing he got hit by a car

What is big has a red nose and is funny Don't ask me I have never been out of my house

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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