...Jack Vale

Why did the McCann's parent's leave the window's and doors open? Because Portugal is a very hot climate, And they expected the place they were staying to be safe as lot's of tourist's stay there throughout the year.

Ross Tumilty is gay 8===D

Knock Knock The homeowner's acquaintance had called him just minutes prior because he had forgotten something at his house. With this having occurred, the homeowner had a strong sense of who was at the door. Being a cautious person however, he checked his prediction by examining the man through the door's peephole. Having asserted that it was what he had in mind, the homeowner opened the door and handed him some papers that were of importance to the acquaintance.

Q. Which is bigger, a dog or the Statue of Liberty? (Trick question! Think carefully before looking at the answer!) A. The Statue of Liberty.

if life gives you lemons, you have some lemons

What's the difference between a tube of toothpaste and Youtube? If you squeeze a tube of toothpaste then toothpaste comes out. You cannot squeeze Youtube because it is a popular video sharing website. Even if you could squeeze it, no toothpaste would come out..

Knock Knock Whos there? Its dad mom died....

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir......my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They scolded her and sent her to her room.

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

What did the Japanese kid get for his birthday? Nothing, his gifts were washed away.

Knock knock. Who's there? Jeff. Jeff who? Sh*t. Wrong house.

Slavery

whats purple and brown lucozade sport

Why couldn't the girl swing on the swing set? She had no arms.

Whats worse than getting a paper-cut? Getting shot. In the head. Three times.

READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF YOUR A FUCKHEAD READ THIS IF 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Why did the doctor commit suicide? His wife was recently killed in a car accident and simply could not take the emotional pain!

How many fingers do u have? 11 Start with left pinky count 10,9,8,7,6 then 6+5=11

We start counting at 1, therefore 0 is countless. I've slept with countless women.

How did Barry Bonds break the career homerun record? A combination of natural ability, practice, and a plethora of performance enhancing drugs.

Did you know that I can't talk any louder than this... Exept when I can

One day a black guy bought some fried chicken. The clerk said: Lol you guys always eat chicken! Lol said the black guy, yeah I am here a lot. Clerk: No I meant your kind of you know... I KNOW WHAT? Clerk: You guys at the studio next door! Oh, yeah, lol I almost thought you meant my skin color! Clerk: You fucking Negroes always thinking we are racist...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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