Why did the squirrel cross the... *Squash*

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Knock knock Who's there? I Love You! -Harrison

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? It's me, Jeremy. Oh, great to see you! Come inside. They then have a great time watching TV and eating snacks

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Why did the man have a finger coming out of his ear? He had a birth defect.

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An Asian walks into a bar. He has a few drinks, but makes sure not to have to many. He then drives home safely, and enjoys a good nights rest.

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A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

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whats worse than being cold? having a pine cone shoved up your ass.

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A lonely man walks into a Self-Esteem class. He sits alone in the back because of his low self-esteem. Forever alone.

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knock knock

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Why did Justin Bieber smile in his mug shot? He did not understand the consequences of his horrible actions that could have killed many innocent men, woman, or children and, in jail, there could be very dangerous people living there.

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A lady walks into her bedroom and sees her boy friend having sex with another girl. She hears the phone ring and a voice says "your grandma died".

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What do you call a secret agent that lives in a bottle of washing up liquid? Bubble-0-7

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What did the watermelon say to the apple? Nothing. Watermelons are fruits and incapable of speech.

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Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being hit by a plane.

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Trump will make America great again.

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What did Jeff do to the bench? He sat on it

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Your mother just died.

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Nothing yet CC

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What do you do if there's a black guy bleeding on your lawn? Help Him

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Once upon a time, there was a a loving couple. When they first kissed, the girl's heart skipped a beat, but it wasn't because of love. It was a heart murmur. She died. The end.

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What did the horse say to the other horse? We are both horses

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How many hispanics does it take to screw in a light bulb. One. Just one. You just screw it in, it's not that complicated.

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What did the man say when he lost his phone? Answer: I lost my phone!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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