What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a Buddhist monk walk into a bar. They discuss their differences over a pint of beer and leave with a greater understanding of each other's faiths.

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What did the fat girl say to her friend? I'm fat.

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What's the cutest thing about a redhead? I know, I couldnt think of anything either

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A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas

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Knock, knock Whos there? docter doctor who? yes how did you know?

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Q:What happened when Smokey the Bear was the one who started the forest fire? A: He got arrested just like you would have

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two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the the wheels.

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Me: "If I had Alzheimers, I would break down into tears." Friend: "Why, you would forget why you were crying..." Me: "Who are you again?"

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I am nobody Nobody is perfect Therefore, I am perfect

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What did the father say to his son? I'm leaving and I'm not actually your father.

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Why were there bones on the moon? The cow diden't make it.

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What's better than having an iPad? I don't know, I lost both my hands.

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Why did the horse stop runnIng? His master beat him to death.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Whats is pathetic and just plain sad? Gas prices these days.

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Women

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Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

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Why did the middle age man walk across the street? There were no vehicles currently driving on that particular road

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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