i like turtals and kids

thumb_up thumb_down

knock knock Who's there? ... Hello?

thumb_up thumb_down

Why are you reading this joke? There is this nice 'Bad Idea T-Shirts' ad right there.

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats funnier than the Holocaust? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: What do you call a man from south korea? A: I don't know, but I'm not letting him drive my car.

thumb_up thumb_down

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H20" and the second one says, "I'll have some H20 too." The second scientist dies after drinking hydrogen peroxide.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did kurt cobain kill himself? He was experiencing heavy depression

thumb_up thumb_down

A large man goes into a restaurant and places his order The waiter asks if he would like the weight watchers menu He says no because he doesnt care about his weight

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse, a dog dying or cancer? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was the blonde crying? She had just been raped by a 10-foot praying mantis.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's black and white and red all over? A chess board; I lied about the "red all over" part.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the Black guy, the Asian, and the White guy have in common? they were all brutally murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down

An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down

Hey I just met you And I am crazy So I will kill you And eat your body

thumb_up thumb_down

How to you confuse an Alzheimer's patient? Present her with a complicated nuclear physics problem.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the difference between a wife and a chef? A chef has the choice to leave the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red pickel are green i split you legs whats in between

thumb_up thumb_down

What has 7 mouths 3 eyes and 5 noses Something very ugly

thumb_up thumb_down

What is green, slimy and has 8 legs? Uncle Martin

thumb_up thumb_down

Why does blond women give great blowjob? Because they has vaacum in thier heads! Blond woman coment; well thats better than having nothing at all in your head! :-)

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a black priest? Father

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock knock! Who's there? Boo! Boo who? Aww, don't cry!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what did the horse say to the bartender? why the short face?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops