What is a pirate's favorite kind of pizza? Cheese.

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A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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I saw a man one day i saw him the next day and the next and the next i didn't see him ever again

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Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's me Ok, come in (the knockers voice was familiar enough that giving a name would have been out of place)

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Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating at night? A: Yell "DROP IT NIGGAH!" Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating in the day time? A: Run away cause your house is haunted.

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A man goes to his drug dealer to buy Meth, there is no joke here, he is addicted to meth.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I have not seen chicken since I was very young, on my parents' farm. This is before the Cossacks slaughtered them. I can still hear screams of sister as soldiers ravaged her. But back to question, where did you see chicken? I am very, very hungry.

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Why does my ass hurt I played gmod with a blackpeople

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your momma is so poor she had you just for the free milk

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What is Justin Bieber + One less lonely girl. A BABY

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Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

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who is still together after all the crap they have been through? your butt cheeks

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What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

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Why did the girl suck the other guy off? to get paid

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A cruise ship took sail. It was about a mile out into the water already. The blonde had missed the ship when it set sail. She was only capable of swimming a mile. She swam a half a mile out after the ship, and then turned around. She then later died due to a severe case of hypothermia due to the temperatures of the water for long periods of time.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Tell somebody that someone told you they look like an owl. When they say "Who?" laugh in their face

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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One white male lives in a city with all blacks. He puts up with gang violence nearly every day.

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Q: Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? A: Because he's dead.

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What do you Call L.L. Cool J's mexican cousin? El El Bean

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Why did Charlie Sheen laugh at the TV? Because there happened to be a comedy on.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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