two goldfish are in a tank they swim around happily and have no consciousness of what is happening because of their short memory.

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How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

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What do you get if you cross a Black Man with a Knife? Stabbed.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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Poop

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Why was the teacher laying on the floor? Because shes dead...

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What do you get when you combine KIA and NOKIA? A cheap vehicle with a cheap mobile phone inside.

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knock knock whos there not me

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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What do you Call L.L. Cool J's mexican cousin? El El Bean

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lol

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Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

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Why did the doctor have no peins? She was a woman.

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Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

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what do you call a man that looks like will ferrel? jim

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What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

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How did the Jew escape being put in the gas chamber? He killed himself.

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An elephant walks into a bar. He nearly levels the entire structure as he forced his way through the front door.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why can't the t-Rex clap..... Because it is dead

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what did the muffin say to the other muffin when they were in the oven? hi, im a muffin

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Knock Knock There was no answer as the house was empty.

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A blonde, brunette and redhead are stuck on an island that is a mile away from any civilisation.The blonde decides to swim to find help. The blonde swims half a mile, has a rest and then carries on swimming.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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