did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and left leg? he's all right now

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Why did the color blind man cut the red wire and accidentally blew himself up and all the other people involved in the situation? Because he didn't know how to defuse a bomb.

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What is the favorite song of Lady Di? no, that is a dead person and must be respected.

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What do you eat for breakfast and is sometimes blue? Pancakes.

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Knock Knock Whos there? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour who? Wait aren't you the one who's supposed to supposed tell the punchline? Oh Yeah

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what is hollow and bloody? Vagina when it gets genital herpes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

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Why did the the man not take acting? He wasn't good at it.

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An elephant walks into a bar. He nearly levels the entire structure as he forced his way through the front door.

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Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white

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How do you fit 6000000 jews into a car? 1 in the front, 1 in the back and the rest in the ashtray.

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How many Puerto Ricans does it take to clog the treads of my tank? Eight

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Women's rights.

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Paperclip... BANANA?!

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yeah..

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whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

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what do you call a pig that knows karate? pork-chop!

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Q: John has 400 cookies, 200 hundred are chocolate chip and the rest are sugar. John eats 100 of each, what does he have now? A: Diabetes

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what do you call a black man on the moon? Kid Cudi

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he can't fly

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Roses are Red Violets are blue Goldfish

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What is green with wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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why did the man die? because he died.

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Knock Knock Who's There? 9/11 9/11 who? You said you'd never forget.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops