what did batman say to robin before getting into the car? get in the car.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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What do you call a man with a bad haircut? A man with a bad haircut

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Why did hale say I have but one life to give for my country? He has one life

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Why was the baby crying? It wasn't it got hit by a bus and died.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind.

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Why did the blonde buy a hotdog? She didn't. She has chronic anorexia.

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Hi

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Why did the man pick the flower? Because he didn't like flowers.

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I'm the rubber and you're the glue, whatever you say sends vibrations through the air that hit my eardrum and my brain interprets these vibrations as what your are saying.

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This is my firstever post so I wanted to make it very specialand have it really mean something, then I though fark that for a joke

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Whats the difference between a ham sandwich and a dead baby sandwich? I don't stomp on my ham sadnwiches with cleats before I eat them.

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ALL OF YOU NO MORE CURSING EVEN THOUGH ITS NOT POSSABLE SO DON'T LISTEN

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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Gues what makes me smile Mouth muscles

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What did the blind kid get for Christmas? A collection of braile children's reading books.

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What's the difference between Justin Beeber and a Basett hound? I don't know.

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Grandma walked into the kitchen...

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rihno? Rihno-elephant

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national song of the mute person? 5 minutes of silence please

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How do you make an eggroll? You push it.

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Why did the girl suck the other guy off? to get paid

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Ever hear the joke about the black guy going to jail its not a joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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