You should really respect vegetables more. They rock. They're all like... AAAHH!!!... and I'm all like... DUDE! THAT'S SO INCREDIBLY RANDOM!... and seriously, you should respect da veggies!

How many black people does it take to change a light bulb. One, of course. Assuming he/she does not have any physical or mental handicaps.

Two men and a woman walk into a bar. They are all viciously murdered by a serial killer, who as he walks out, runs into a pole and suffers from a concussion, which he later dies from.

69

How do you make a clown cry? Kill his wife and kids.

What do you call a white person on a leash? A toddler.

Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

What did 6 say to 7? Nothing, numbers are abstract concepts thought up by humans and therefore, they cannot speak or converse in any sort of language.

What do you call a black man that goes to college? A student..

What is green and invisible? This cabbage.

A man walks into a pole.

Were can you find a bag of meth? A drug dealer

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being shot repeatedly in the chest.

What's worse than getting a jigsaw puzzle for your birthday? Slavery

how Sudan answered England when England's ambassador eaten by Sudanese people? Eat ours

LeBron James hits a game winning three with time running out in the Finals.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? He had heard from a mutual friend that his ex-girlfriend, who he had recently broken up with, would be present at the same party and to avoid an awkward encounter he chose not to go.

ive got a joke for you Nicki minajs ase

Why did he buy ANTIJOKE THE BOOK! - ? Because he wanted to read it.

lol

Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer-pressure.

Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

A man walks into a bar. He leaves when he realizes he is supposed to be at a business meeting

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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