What's the difference between a black man and a pile of shit ? One is a black man, the other is a pile of shit.

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What did the blind kid get for Christmas? A collection of braile children's reading books.

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Q:What's red and fluffy? A: A blue rock, if blue were red and rocks were fluffy

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Why did the boy eat the potato? I don't know. Neather do I. :(

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Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

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What did the gay logger do to the tree with a hole in it? Cut it down.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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What did the Muffin say to the other muffin ? I dont know

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What do all of these jokes have in common? They're not funny. You see, the definition of an anti-joke is a "type of indirect humor that involves the joke-teller delivering something which is deliberately not funny, or lacking in intrinsic meaning. The audience is expecting something humorous, and when this does not happen, the irony itself is of comedic value." As this is a page full of anti-jokes, we know to expect the unfunny - thus robbing us of the experience of an anti-joke.

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It’s dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue (not really) I have Alzheimer's Cheese on toast

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This is my firstever post so I wanted to make it very specialand have it really mean something, then I though fark that for a joke

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This guy dies and his wife gets him cremated. She takes the ashes home and lays them out on the table and starts talking to them. "You know that fur coat you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money. You know the new car you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money." Then she whispers, "You know that blowjob I promised you? Well, here it comes..."

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Q: Whats worse than the death of flappy bird? A: The holocaust.

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What did the poor sickly orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What do you call a man with a bad haircut? A man with a bad haircut

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What did the old lady say when she went to a restaurant? OH look at the price of this salad.

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Q: what's black and white and red all over? A: someone getting murderd on a news paper

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Why did the blond play Russian roulette? She is very poor and needs the money so she can feed her son.

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why did the black guy win a gold medal in the olympics? hard work, dedication and determanation! what no one else can be bothered to do anymore because of all this new technology and stuff!! get of your arse and do something active. NOW!

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Two men and a woman walk into a bar. They are all viciously murdered by a serial killer, who as he walks out, runs into a pole and suffers from a concussion, which he later dies from.

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Why i Hate people. They are alive. The are breathing. The are near me.

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whats white and cant climb a fence? a fridge

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Augustus was touring his Empire and noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself. Intrigued, he asked: ‘Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?’ ‘No, your Highness,’ he replied, ‘but my father was.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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