How do you get a fat man to drop a brownie? Make fun of him until he kills himself, and then drops the brownie.

how do you blindfold an asian...a piece of dental floss

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

What is big and wet and smells like mushrooms? A big wet mushroom.

Mirror mirror on the wall. Why can't I see?

What's a pirate's favorite color? Depends on the pirate.

Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because he didn't have a face

Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

What did the fat man do when someone told him he was fat? He kept eating, for he was deaf.

Q) Whats wet fishy and gets caught by fishermen? A) fish.

What did the monkey say to dog Foreskin

yo mama is so dumb she went to dr. dre for a pepsmear

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply because he was incapable of speech.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems are pointless Refrigerator.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and trampoline? Well, children jump on one to obtain enjoyment, while a pile of dead babies is a sick tragedy.

yo mama so fat, her favorite food is seconds.

I had sex. Just kidding.

What do blacks and the night have in common? Their both worse than when it's light

knock knock , who there ray, ray who , ray winstone , I am your daddy you'll get your perks.

1+1 =? Too

what's brown and sticky? A stick!

Chuck Norris doesn't swim... He never learned

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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