- Knock knock - Those knock jokes are getting old - Indeed. Scratch scratch - MY DOOR

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A proton and a neutron talk to each other. Two atoms are walking down the street one day, and one of them says to the other: "Hey, wait up a second. I think I lost an electron" The first atom replied, "Are you sure?" The second atom said, "Oh, wait. Never mind. I found it."

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yo mommas so ugly that everyone died.

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A Chinese man walks into a bar. With his thick accent, he finds it difficult to order drinks.

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A stop sign walks into a bar. Looks like somebody invented walking stop signs.

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What's gay, has ten eyes and is gay. One D. Kelvin Yang.

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What did the avocado say to the person? I can't talk

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Once, one man had a horse. And the horse had nothing against it

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knock knock

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What's yellow and if it gets in your eye, you'll die? a yellow train.

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Q: What do you call a black person with one leg? A: In modern American society, it is proper etiquette to adress somebody by their first name.

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knock knock.. who's there? ted? ted, who? STOP f***ing around, you got cancer!

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roses are red, violets? are blue, Im not good at poems, tits

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Q: How many light bulbs does it take to change a blonde? A: One, if she tries to swallow it.

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Why did the Spice Girls stop performing? They mutually agreed to stop performing.

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(for comedians) I went to a coffee shop the other day. I ordered a coffee then sat down. Behind me there were two people talking. I didn't eves drop because it's impolite so I drank my coffee and left.

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What do you call 100 black people at the bottom of the ocean? An unfortunate tragedy and astonishingly ironic curcumstance.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None, now stop hallutinating about wood chuck.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and death, making her oblivious of her surroundings and would be a danger to fellow commuters. -mac

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why dont black people go on cruises? there not falling for that one again

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What did the orphan get on his birthday? Cancer.

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What is red and does not cry? Half a baby.

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? You hit him with an axe How can you release your anger at somebody? Kill them How do you stop a bus? Throw small children at it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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