Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say orange? Well, you shouldn't be. I came to inform you your entire family died in a car crash.

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Do you know what will hurt? Getting hurt.

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women's rights

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Yeah its just my way of saying that I appreciate you worrying so much about me, you are a sweet girl, Honestly I do not understand why the hell you guys are using Horsehead AntiJoke out of all places, there are far more terrible forgettable sites available, I mean this sites connection suddenly went from disgustingly terrible to fine and dandy, the Feds, the Interpol and even fucking Al Qaeda might be reading every single message, but there is no way in hell anyone can decipher the code format, if they could, they would have done it when I invented it sixteen years ago, Myself mind you, nothing subtle about me today apparently.

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how many prostitutes does it take to fix a lightbulb? it depends how much you pay them

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Yo momma's so dirty that she washes her hands with anti-bacterial soap.

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Zach Murfitt has a huge penis! Lol jk he has an inchy stryder

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas ? Because sadly his father is an alcoholic and cant support him nor his family.

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What did Helen Keller say to a stranger at a party? I earned a Bachelor of Arts degree, wrote several books, traveled to over 39 countries, and was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom, one of the United States' highest two civilian honors, from President Lyndon B. Johnson.

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What is the way to a woman's heart? Through her chest cavity.

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asian, do math

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Why did the dog bark at the tall white man? Because the tall white man was in the process of attempting to rob the house in which said dog was situated. The dog was merely defending its patch.

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why did the dog jump into the pool? because the cat was chasing him

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What percentage of her brain does Sarah Palin use? 100%. That humans use only 10 or 30% of their brains is a myth.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the World Chicken Road Crossing Competition.

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Why did Jack explode? He had a sneezier and his army friend Stephan threw a grenade at him because he was scared.

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How can you tell that your friend just had sex with a blonde? The girl he just had sex with has blonde hair.

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What do you get when you cross a donkey and a horse? a mule

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What the difference between water and water? Nothing, they're both water.

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what did one tree say to the other? move over

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What's worse than hearing another Holocaust anti-joke? The Holocaust.

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Q. Why does Samuel Jackson always play a black guy? A. Because he's black.

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What did one potato say to the other. Let's get baked!( hope u dont mind that this isnt a anti-joke well i dont know what it is so sue me)

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Q:What did grandma get for christmas? A:a coffen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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