A bartender walks into a bar. It's his shift.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 3

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A Jewish guy walked into a bar... and said "ow"

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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What's black and white and eats like a horse? A zebra.

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Whats worse than 3 black guys. 4 black guys.

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How do you keep a puppy warm? You throw it in the fire...

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How do you teach your daughter to stop wetting the bed? Cut her best friends eye-lids off at her birthday party.

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A man walks into a bar with an ape. The ape defecates on the floor. The bartender ordered them both out.

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta pudding god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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knock knock.. who's there? ted? ted, who? STOP f***ing around, you got cancer!

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a black man, spanish man, and white man all fall off a building. and as they fall, i wonder: why are you laughing?

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A man walks into a bar. Another man walks into a bar.

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guess what? What? you have to guess...your mama

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Pull over dat ass to fat, no seriously your blocking a firelane

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Hi.

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Knock. Knock Who's there? Jim. Jim who? Jim your best friend.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? It's not. Numbers are not living organisms and thus are incapable of experiencing emotion.

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Roses are red, Violets aren't blue, They're fucking violet, And I hate you.

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Why doesnt the ladder work? A ladder is an inaminent object therefore imcapable of having a job.

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A man with a gun walks into a bar. The police are called and the man was killed quickly.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but I'm your stalker, welcome to my deserted warehouse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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