What did the duck say when it walked into the house? This isn't where I live.

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on how much you compress them.

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Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's dead

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Q: What is worse than The Apocalypse? A: Darkseid, Thanathos, Red Hulk, Onslaught, come on The Apocalypse cant even beat the X-men! Moral: "I AM THE APOCALYPSE, YOU ARE NOT FIT TO SURVIVE!"

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I THINK I SEE BIGFOOT O is yo mom!! -____-

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, sauce on apples.

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What do you call a fat black guy in KFC? A guy who likes KFC.

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What did the compliemantry peanuts say to the man? "Nice tie."

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knock knock, whos there? the repo man.

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Q.why did the chicken cross the road A. To eat some Kentucky Fried Chicken get it KFC

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Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? It isn't doing anything, sir. It's dead.

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http://anti-joke.com/

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Dubstep < Music

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How do you make someone cry Take all of their belongings

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't like anyone who is not a straight, white male.

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Why couldn't the plane fly? The pilot was a muffin.

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knock knock WUUUZZZZZUUUUUUUUP!!!!! WUUUUZZZZZUUUUUUUP!!! WUUZZZZUUUUUUUUP!!! WUUZUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP!! WUUUUUZZZZUU......

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A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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what did the chicken say to the vet? nothing chickens dont talk

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How does Helen Keller do her taxes? Unfortunately, she doesn't. Her friends have strongly encouraged her to proactively contact the IRS to see if she can undergo a repayment plan of some sort and obtain governmental assistance for her future filings.

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My dog has no nose! Then how does he smell? Terrible!

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What's the difference between a cow and a purple sweater? They're both purple Besides the cow

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Knock knock. Who's there? Black guy. Due to your skin tone I feel you may cause potential danger to me and my family, so for that reason I will not allow you to enter my home.

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Why was the tomato blushing? It saw the salad dressing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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