What is green and red all over? The Hulk's Penis in a blender

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What do you get when you cross a lion with a rhinoceros? A trip to the hospital and animal cruelty charges.

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Humpdy dumpty sat on a wall and enjoyed his day off

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Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A:Nothing. They're tubes of glue. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said object is, are not capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

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What did the man say when he saw a truck in his yard? There's a truck in my yard.

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Yo mama's so ugly that the majority of people find her physically unattractive, but I hear her personality if great.

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what happened the magic tractor?..... it turned into a field

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Chuck Norris' cheese

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What do you call a dumb Asian? An Asian who lacks education.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cook Pu. Ok then. Kelvin Yang.

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everyone's always talking about the emperor's clothes, don't they know this is murica

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what did the jaguar and the girl have in common? Spots, the girl had the chicken pox

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's coop was faulty and thus it escaped.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your boobss.

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How many jews died in a gas chamber? None because the holocaust is a myth.

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What is worse than something terrible happening to you? That same thing happening to me of course... Duh...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Guess what, I have cancer.

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How old is victor? Old

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I went to a hockey game and the strangest thing happened; 2 players got into a fight!

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How do you keep children off your lawn? Molest them

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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Knock Knock It's Open!

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A Jew sits down next to a muslim at the bar. They great and discuss their day's events, they both order beers. Then they go home.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says .... Hey, you shouldn't be in here; you're a big and powerful animal and any sudden movement could be dangerous for anyone around you. You have sharp hooves and we don't carry anything ergonomically designed for you to actually drink out of ... so, it's probably best that you just go ahead and get out of here. The irishman at the bar says to the bartender: Why are you talking to a horse as if it can understand you? They do not understand the spoken word and do not have the vocal chords to reply.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops