What did the scientist say to the postman? So your a postman?

Q: Why did the man have no legs? A: He lost them when his humvee hit a roadside bomb during his last tour in Iraq.

Two women were sitting quietly.

What did the Ethiopian eat for dinner? Nothing

How many jews can you fit in a car? However many seats there are

HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

So, North Korea is getting ready to nuke the US... BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

there are 4 men in a bar talking about how well their sons are doing with their lives. But one man goes to the toilet. So the first man says 'my son is doing really well he is the head of a airline company and for christmas he got his bestfriend a plane.' The second man says' My son is doing really well he has his own car brand and for christmas he got his bestfriend a brand new car.' The third man says' Well my son is doing really well, He owns his own housing estate business and for christmas he bought his best friend a 250'000 sq foot mansion. The fourth man comes out of the toilet and all the three men say ' We are talking about how our sons are doing in their lives so what about yours.' The fourth man goes' well my son is gay but its not that bad because for christmas his three boyfriends got him a new plane, a new car and a 250'000 sq foot mansion.'

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. :D

Jacob Edwards has friends.

John:Why couldn't the T-Rex clay his hands? Billy:Because his arms are too small! John:no he's extinct dumbass

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

Why was the black man screaming? The KKK was coming to lynch him.

what is funnier then a man with AIDS? -nearly anything as AIDS is a serious medical condition and could be potentially lethal

What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

womens rights

What do you call a bird with wings? Redundant.

What did the dog say to his owner? Nothing, dogs do not have mouths that are shaped for forming words. Talking would require too many complex movements of the mouth, and since a dog's brain is very small, it would not have the capacity to hold that much information.

Knock knock Who's there? Hurry up, let me in! Hurry up, let me in, who? *gunshot*

What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red painting.

Some people are like Slinkies: they get really boring after a while.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?? Where's my tractor?

Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? You have HIV.

Q: What did the hobo get for his birthday? A: Older.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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