How so you find out if a black woman is pregnant? Have her take a pregnancy test

A man walks into a bar. Jeremy Lin congratulates him for being a person.

A day without sunshine is like night.

Hey! do you have any updog? Nothing much! you?

What do you call an anti joke with no punchline?

My butt!!!!

The lemons on the tree are ripe. They will be picked.

Why cant Hellen Keller Drive? Because shes a women.

what happened to the autistic child that traveled to antarctica? he died.

you know what hurts.... PAIN

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

Your mother is so white that when she goes to the beach she has to wear sunscrean to avoid being badly sun burned.

What do airplanes and grapes have in common? They both have wings, except a grape doesn't.

a blond, brunette, and red head run away from cops and hide in potato sacks. the officer went up to the brunette and kicked the potato bag and the brunette went "woof" "woof". the officer went to the red head and kicked the potato bag and the red head went "meow" "meow". the officer goes to the blond and kicked the potato bag and the blond went "potato".

Knock knock Whose there? you you who you know who you are

Patiant: Doctor Doctor i feel like a pair of curtains Doctor: ok Patiant: what shall i do ? Doctor: Go how and stop wasting my time

a redheaded man walks into a bar. he is wanted for raping and murdering 13 children

A bar walks into a bar, it is then you realize you are in an alternate dimension.

what is black, white, and red all over? A bloody panda

There once was a man from Nantucket, whose dick was so long he could provide women with more pleasure than the average male.

Whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer.

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

Why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it was being sexually abused by its father.

RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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