The outside of my house is painted yellow.

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Q. Why did the black man get sent to prison? A. Because he was falsely accused of murder.

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What did the white guy the black guy and the Asian all have in common Penises

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Why did the Mexican drive the car off cliff? Because he wanted to.

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Why did the Jewish man kill his wife? Who cares.

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Who ate the cookies? Your face. Litterally.

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Why did the Jew pick up the penny? Because he dropped it

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What did the man with leprosy say to the prostitute? Keep the tip

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When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.

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What word starts with 'f' and ends in 'uck'? Firetruck

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted to see his mother before she passed away of terminal cancer

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Why was the man named Thomas? Because that was his name

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Why did the ckicken cross the road? to kiss my ass

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What's yellow and smells like piss? Urine.

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How can a black man burn his pop-tarts? If he leaves them in the toaster for too long.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He saw and ice cream truck across the street and rode towards it as fast as he could, sadly it was rush hour and he was hit by a speeding ambulance because he forgot to look both ways.

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Two rabbits are being chased by dogs and hide in a log in the forest. The male pushes the female to the dogs which are at both sides of the log and gets off Scott free.

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Water, please.

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Women's rights.

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Two small boys are walking in a schoolyard. One of the boys sits down under a tree looking distraught. The other asks him "Well whats the matter Eddy?" "Every time I walk to my bus-stop in the morning, Jimmy Krugan, pushes me down and takes my money. " The first boy thinks for sec.. "Well here's what you do Ed; go to your Dad's shed and grab a 2X4, paint it bright blue. In the morning, walk to school with it under your jacket and when Jimmy starts in on you give him a good wallop. He wont be bothering you anymore." The following day the boys are in the yard again. Eddy is seen under the tree seeming just as distraught. Confused, the boy asks him.. "Well Ed, did you do what I told you?" "No."

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Two oranges walking down the street, one says to the other, "Where do you live?". The other replies "I'm not telling you, you'll steel my washing"

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7,8,9! (Also it killed his family and nuked his country too)

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Roses are blue, Violets are green, I am color blind, You have cancer.

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alcoholism kills

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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